Off With Those Training Wheels

Recent experience reminded me that  the longer you keep the training wheels attached to a bicycle, the longer it takes for the learner to build the confidence to go without it. Sure they’re useful. They minimize the bumps and bruises. However, being too afraid of the  bumps and bruises could mean keeping the training wheels longer than necessary.The bumps and bruises help a lot in the learning process to you know. They teach us how to get up after a fall and hopefully learn how to balance better to avoid the painful fall. The experience too, should teach us that the pain of a fall is nothing compared to the joy of the ride.

This is true with bicycles as it is with life. As parents, leaders managers, and teachers, we sometimes fear letting go. As children, learners and wards we become too dependent for our own good. We all know those training wheels will have to go one day. It’s just that one day is not today. Remember the lesson. The longer you keep them, the longer it takes for you to face the challenges of life. Remember too that even the best cyclists crash and fall once in a while. My point is, the only way to avoid falling from a bike, is to never ride it. But do you really want that?

That Displacement Experiment

I’m reminded of a science experiment inspired by Archimedes’ eureka moment that we did during elementary school. It’s where we learned a couple of things. One; the amount of water displaced when an object of a particular size is submerged to it determines the volume of the object; two; two objects of similar volume cannot occupy the same space at the same time and third, no matter the weight difference; objects of similar size will occupy the same amount of space.

Now, I’m not good in Science, in fact I’m not even sure I remember this experiment all correctly. However, I am very sure that pretty much the same principle applies to life. That the things you do no matter how important or unimportant occupy a finite amount of space and that no two things of similar size no matter the weight difference can occupy the same space. So I’d say be careful what you put in your life.

I often hear people wanting to be more successful, wealthier or happier or simply wanting to be better but unable to do something about it. More often, this is because their life is full of stuff that do not contribute to the achievement of their goals. There are just no space available for them to place the things that will weigh more heavily in their personal pursuits. So we hear people say, I want to earn more, but won’t sacrifice being out of their comfort zone to try out new ways to earn. Some people ask me to help them become trainers like me. I would give them the tools but they can’t find  the time to use them. They are unwilling to remove some stuff in their lives that occupy the space where these tools could have been used. They can’t take the movie marathons out, they can’t replace their love story novels with books that are relevant to building their training skills. As a Toastmaster, I would hear people say, they want to become better communicators and leaders and Toastmasters looks like their ticket to getting there. They are however, unwilling to pay the price of being there in meetings and participating in the most productive way they can. After sometime, they would quit because Toastmasters is not helping them… No, they are not helping them.

I say look at the principle behind displacement. No two objects of similar size no matter what the weight can occupy the same space at the same time. One will have to be displaced. The question is, which one are you displacing?

Eureka?

Life Lessons from Flying Kites

I loved kite flying when I was a kid and now that I have a baby boy I can’t wait to teach him everything I know about flying kites and the life lessons that I learned to go with it.

Here are some of the lessons I learned from making and flying kites:

1. The air worthiness of my kite is my responsibility. I can choose to make my kite or buy some ready made but I should be able to distinguish a good kite from a bad one. I’m responsible for every decision I make. I equip my self to make the right decisions.  I can’t blame anyone for any of them.

2. It’s all in the balance. No matter how potentially good the kite is if I fail to balance the string or the line, it won’t fly well. LIfe is all about balance. If we ignore our other needs or the people around us and focus only on the demand of the day, we will eventually go crashing down and hit the ground.

3. Getting help in making or flying a kite is more fun and you show your gratitude by sharing the kite. There’s hardly anything in this life that we can accomplish without help from others. Recognize them and share the fruit of your success with them.

4. Making the kite is more than half the fun. Success is sweeter when it’s hard earned. It’s also hard to call success a success if you did not work for it.

5. It’s all about choices. We choose our kite, we choose our string, we choose the timing for flying it, we choose who to fly it with. The quality of the experience depends on the quality of our choices. It is true with kite flying as it is with living.

6. You don’t just throw away a kite that won’t fly well. You try to do something about it by adjusting the balance of the string. Maybe a tail can help or additional weight on the left or on the side depending on the kite’s behavior on air. You dont’ throw away a life just because things are not going well. You figure out how to make it better and actually do something.

7. You can’t fly boka-boka (the simplest kite) forever, you graduate to more awesome and perhaps bigger kites. To an average enthusiast, flying a Gurion (bigger more complex kite)is the ultimate goal. Even as children we are taught to challenge ourselves to pursue bigger things. When we fail to do that as grownups we betray our natural design.

8. If I lose a kite, it’s good to know that  I can use what I learned from the experience to build a better kite or how to fly a kite better. Nothing is really totally lost or wasted. Even when we lose something or fail at something in our lives there is always something to be gained – the lesson on how to become better.

The Same River Twice

They say that You can never step in the same river twice. This is because each time you step into a river, it is not the same river and you are not the same person. You bring change to the river and the river brings change to you even without trying. We live in an ever changing world. Those changes in the world bring about the dynamic changes in us.

I guess what matters most is not that we change or that we influence change in the world. What is important is the kind of change we bring to others and the change others bring to us. Do we bring positive change? Do we respond well to the changes around us? These are the more important questions that we must strive to answer in the affirmative

Your Bag of Seeds

We all have our own bags of seeds. We decide when to unpack them, plant them, grow them till they bear fruits.

Sometimes the idea alone of the  effort necessary in making that happen is so petrifying that we hesitate to let the seeds out of their bags.

Sometimes we think that laying the seed to the ground is enough that we fail to nurture it. When it fails to deliver on our expectations, we say bad seed.

But those who know the nature of seeds, those who are determined to do what it takes to get the seed to bear fruit, know that waiting is not enough.

We all have our own bags of seeds and they are called TALENTS.

They are worthless inside the bag. They won’t achieve their full potential, just laying on the ground. They have to be cultivated, nourished, fertilized and nurtured.

Ask these: How much of your seeds are out of the bag?

What have you done to make them bear fruits?

If you are not doing what it takes, it’s just right to lower your expectations.

Is reading this makes you want to work on your bag of seeds?

Are your going to take concrete steps towards achieving your full potentials?

Put some deadlines  to it will you?

And be accountable for it.