39

If you think about it, 39 is an interesting number. If you multiply the first digit by itself, you get the second digit. If people reset their age every time they become teenagers, I would have been teenager 3 times by now. Most importantly, it warns of an ending and signals a new beginning. The end of a decade is on the horizon and the fourth baton in life’s relay is already being waved.

This probably explains the pensive mood. I am spending this day in deep thought of what this particular day really means to me. I believe that age is just a number and not a milestone. One may spend so much time, maybe even as long as 39 years going nowhere or nowhere significant. Comparing time with distance however measures a performance. It makes me wonder if I’ve covered enough grounds given the time I’ve spent on this planet. It boosts my pride that I’ve done well considering all the stops  and detours I had to take in this journey. It keeps my ego in check knowing that I did not do well enough to say that what I did is spectacular enough to consider worth emulating. As a matter of fact, I can say with humility that much of my life is rather a study of “”don’t s” than of “do’s”. My children would know what I mean. I know that I’m taking this journey on my own terms, my own rules. From time to time, I have to remind myself that because I sometimes tend to compare with others and wonder if my own terms and rules are not made as excuse for not being at par with others.

39 to me sounds like a deadline, a reason to hustle, to achieve something  more significant, something I can use as a starting capital for the next decade. I look at the time and the scores and realize it’s time to rethink some strategies. I am both excited and fearful of that thought.  That’s because I am both excited and fearful of change. I am just thankful of the guiding light my father left me. He said fear is no reason to quit. Fear is a reason to get better, muster all my strengths and do my best. That’s why he’s the bravest person I’ve ever known.That is also why, failure although it scares the hell out of me, never stopped me.

So 39, I guess is a milestone afterall, a milestone of my journey in time.  As I ran pass the marker,I decided that 39 is going to be a year of more more and less less. This year I promise to enjoy more and complain less, to give more and need less,to appreciate myself more and punish myself less, to appreciate others more and criticize less, to work harder and play even harder, to celebrate life and prepare for more years of celebrations.

There are very good reasons to celebrate 39 – a bigger family means more special people to love and a bigger network of friends to share this life with. The thing I celebrate the most is the daily opportunity to touch another person’s life. My wish for the next few numbers that will come to my life is more opportunity to spend time with family and friends and more opportunity to be of use to other people. To the numerous people who greeted me today, thank you! May you stay my friends forever.

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